Is Russian Hard To Learn?
Last updated: December 16, 2024
So you want to learn Russian, but it's commonly considered to be one of the hardest languages in the world. Taking about ten seconds to look into the basics of the language would seem to confirm this suspicion: the Russian word for "hello", здравствуйте (zdravstvuite) is several syllables long and contains some consonant clusters we don't use in English.
Check for yourself: здравствуйте
Say what you will, that's definitely a step up from hola.
But what is it about the Russian language, exactly, that makes it so hard to learn?
- What makes Russian so hard to learn, in a nutshell
- The Cyrillic alphabet (the Russian alphabet)
- [Russian grammar] Grammatical case, grammatical gender, and verbs
- [Russian vocabulary] Word formation, verbs of motion, and verbal aspect
- [Russian pronunciation] Palatalization, lexical stress, and new sounds
- [Cultural differences] Resources, friendship, and communication style
- Some silver linings for English speakers who want to learn Russian
What makes Russian so hard to learn, in a nutshell
We're going to get into the nitty gritty in a second, but what most of these points boil down to is that Russian is a fusional language, whereas English is an analytical language.
This means that whereas English likes to have nice clean words that don't really change shape that much—a duck is a duck is a duck—pretty much all Russian words come with several possible shapes. For example, in Russian, a duck is утка (utka) if it's flying in the air but утку (utku) if you're eating it. This has implications for grammar, vocabulary, pronunciation, and even how you go about writing the Cyrillic alphabet.
Setting aside the question of whether Russian is difficult, we can definitely say that it is very different than English.
If you want to learn Russian, and you're a native English speaker, I would simply say that the language will feel difficult until you figure out how its logic works. Once you've got that down, many things will click quite quickly.
The Cyrillic alphabet (the Russian alphabet)
The name for the Russian alphabet is the Cyrillic script, named after the Greek monk Cyril. The bad news is that the Cyrillic script is indeed different than the Latin script that we use in English, but the good news is that there's actually quite a bit of overlap.
In fact, even without studying it, you'll recognize about 15% of the Russian alphabet:
Capital | Lowercase | English Approximation |
---|---|---|
А | а | a |
Т | т | t |
О | о | o |
М | м | m |
К | к | k |
And then there's two more letters that you'll probably recognize if you squint a bit:
Capital | Lowercase | English Approximation |
---|---|---|
Б | б | b |
Д | д | d |
There's several more letters that look kinda funky, but at least sound very similar to an English sound:
Capital | Lowercase | English Approximation |
---|---|---|
Й | й | y (as in Joy) |
И | и | ee (as in Joey) |
Я | я | ya |
Е | е | ye |
Ё | ё | yo |
Э | э | eh |
У | у | ooh (as in goose) |
Ю | ю | you (as in universe) |
З | з | z |
С | с | s |
В | в | v |
Ф | ф | f |
Н | н | n |
Г | г | guh |
П | п | puh |
Р | р | r |
Х | х | ch (as in loch) |
Ч | ч | ch (as in cheese) |
And then there's a handful of letters that are just completely new:
Capital | Lowercase | English Approximation |
---|---|---|
Ш | ш | "sh", but with the tip of the tongue pointing upwards |
Щ | щ | Put your tongue in position to say "y" as in "yes", and say "sh" while holding that shape |
Ж | ж | The difference between Ш and Ж is is the same as that of "s" and "z" |
Ц | ц | "Ts" as in "cats", but can appear anywhere in a word |
Ь | ь | Search this page (Ctrl + "f") for "soft sign" |
Ъ | ъ | Search this page (Ctrl + "f") for "hard sign" |
If you want to learn to write the Cyrillic alphabet, or just want to get a bit more practice, you can try writing these words. They're cognates (shared between Russian and English), so if you can work out what the letters sound like, you'll understand what the words mean.
- Атом
- Банк
- Бомба
- Транспорт
- Журналист
- Коммуникация
Putting all that together, here's how to write "the Cyrillic alphabet" in Russian: Кириллица.
Can you read it?
If not, don't worry! The Cyrillic alphabet may look scary now, but it'll become second nature very quickly, once you start diving into Russian texts.
[Russian grammar] Grammatical case, grammatical gender, and verbs
Generally speaking, when people say that Russian is hard, they mean that Russian grammar is hard. To speak Russian grammatically correctly, you need to be able to use the right form of Russian verbs, Russian nouns, and Russian adjectives... and there are a lot of forms to keep track of. That means a fair bit of memorization for most learners, and also getting familiar with some rather technical grammatical concepts.
Here's the top three things about Russian grammar that, in my opinion, will trip learners up:
Grammatical case (noun declensions)
We won't go into a ton of detail here, but here's a demonstration of what grammatical cases are:
English | Russian | Generally used to... | Rough English approximation |
---|---|---|---|
Именительный падеж | Indicate which noun is the subject of a sentence | The thing doing a verb (I sent you half of a potato in the park via carrier pigeon.) | |
Родительный падеж | Indicate the noun that the subject of a sentence belongs/pertains to | The thing after "of" or "(noun)'s" (I sent you half of a potato in the park via carrier pigeon.) | |
Дательный падеж | Indicate which noun is the indirect object | The direction/recipient of an action (I sent you half of a potato in the park via carrier pigeon.) | |
Винительный падеж | Indicate which noun is the direct object | The thing you do a verb "to" (I sent you half of a potato in the park via carrier pigeon.) | |
Творительный падеж | Indicate which noun is the means by which the subject does something (or who you do something with) | By/with something (I sent you half of a potato in the park via carrier pigeon.) | |
Предложный падеж | Indicate where something takes place | In/at/on ... (I sent you half of a potato in the park via carrier pigeon.) |
We actually technically have these same cases in English, but we communicate them via word order. In Russian, word order is less important because you change the form of nouns and adjectives to show what role they're playing in a sentence.
For example, here are the forms of the Russian word for face:
Case | Noun form (singular) | Noun form (plural) | Rough/possible translation |
---|---|---|---|
Nominative | лицо (litso) | лица (litsa) | The face(s) ... |
Genitive | лица (litsa) | лиц (lits) | ...of the face(s) |
Dative | лицу (litsu) | лицам (litsam) | ...to/toward the face(s) |
Accusative | лицо (litso) | лица (litsa) | (hit/touch/see/etc.) the face(s) |
Instrumental | лицом (litsom) | лицами (litsami) | ...with the face(s) |
Prepositional | лице (litse) | лицах (litsax) | ...on the face(s) |
And you can see Russian's cases in action here in this excerpt from Letter to a woman by Sergey Esenin, a famous poem:
- Лицом к лицу, лица не увидать.
Litsom k litsu, litsa ne uvidat.
Face to face, a face cannot be seen.
- лицом (instrumental case) — This might make more sense if you think of a phrase like "with your back to the wall"
- лицу (dative case) — The structure "к + dative case" is used to show the direction/orientation of something
- лица (genitive case) — The structure (no/not + genitive case") is used to say that something isn't (something) or doesn't exist
That's as far as we'll go in this blog post, but cases do unfortunately get a bit more complex than this.
- Single vs plural — As you can see from the table above, there is a singular inflected form of each grammtical case and also a plural inflected form
- Grammatical gender — Лицо is a neuter noun, and most neuter nouns follow a similar set of inflection patterns (the pattern is underlined in the table above); masculine and feminine nouns have different inflection patterns
- Nouns vs adjectives — Adjectives also change forms, depending on the grammatical case of the noun they are modifying
- Patterns & spelling — Russian has a few rules about which letters can/can't follow other letters, and this sometimes causes minor deviations in how a word's inflected forms are spelled
In principle, though, this is how cases work.
Grammatical gender
In Russian, nouns can have one of three possible genders:
- Masculine
- Feminine
- Neuter
Know that it has nothing to do with that gender. The word gender used to mean type, so saying that something was "masculine gender" or "masculine type" just meant that it ended in a pattern that was similar to that of the word man or woman. When Russian says that a word is "masculine in gender", that doesn't mean to say that there's anything manly about it. The vast majority of the time, it's entirely arbitrary.
Anyway!
You can pretty reliably tell what the gender (type) of a noun or adjective is simply by looking at its last couple letters:
- Masculine — the word ends in a consonant or "й"
- Feminine — the word ends in an "а" or "я"
- Neuter — the word ends in an "о" or "е"
- Toss up — If a word ends in ь, it could be masculine or feminine
It's important to know a noun's gender because it affects how grammatical case works. For example, the genitive singular form of masculine nouns generally ends in an "ah" sound, but the genitive singular form of feminine nouns generally ends in an "ee" sound.
Additionally, in Russian, the gender of adjectives must match the gender of nouns. Here's the nominative singular form of the adjective хороший (horoshij, "good") for three different words:
- Masculine — хороший стол (khoróshaya stol, "good table")
- Feminine — хорошая книга (khoróshaya kniga, "good book")
- Neuter — хорошее окно (khorósheye okno, "good window")
And here's all the possible forms of the adjective хороший:
Case | Masculine | Neuter | Feminine | Plural |
---|---|---|---|---|
Nominative | хороший (khoróshiy) | хорошее (khorósheye) | хорошая (khoróshaya) | хорошие (khoróshiye) |
Genitive | хорошего (khoróshevo) | хорошего (khoróshevo) | хорошей (khoróshey) | хороших (khoróshix) |
Dative | хорошему (khoróshemu) | хорошему (khoróshemu) | хорошей (khoróshey) | хорошим (khoróshim) |
Accusative | ||||
- Animate | хорошего (khoróshevo) | хорошее (khorósheye) | хорошую (khoróshuyu) | хороших (khoróshix) |
- Inanimate | хороший (khoróshiy) | хорошее (khorósheye) | хорошую (khoróshuyu) | хорошие (khoróshiye) |
Instrumental | хорошим (khoróshim) | хорошим (khoróshim) | хорошей, хорошею (khoróshey, khorósheyu) | хорошими (khoróshimi) |
Prepositional | хорошем (khoróshem) | хорошем (khoróshem) | хорошей (khoróshey) | хороших (khoróshix) |
Verb conjugations
The good news is that Russian verb conjugation, relative to other languages, is quite straightforward. Russian only has the past, present, and future tenses.
The bad news is that something called verbal aspect is an essential part of Russian verbs, and this will be new to you as a native English speaker. We'll talk about that in a bit.
Combining those two statements:
- Imperfective verbs have a past, present, and future form
- Perfective verbs have a past and future form
All in all, this means that you'll learn two words for most verbs, and you'll also end up learning about ~20 forms/conjugations of each one.
And now let's quickly look at how Russian verbs work.
Russian present tense
Russian has two major types of verbs: those ending in -ать and those ending in -ить.
To conjugate Russian verbs, simply:
- Remove the -ть
- Add one of the below verb endings, depending on who is doing the verb
- For -ить verbs in the "I" or "they" form, remove the entire -ить, not just -ть
Person → | Я, I | Мы, we | Ты, you (informal) | Вы, you (formal) | Он/она/оно | Они, they |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Verbs ending in -ать | -ю | -ем | -ешь | -ете | -ет | -ют |
Verbs ending in -ить | -ю | -им | -ишь | -ите | -ит | -ят |
So, for example:
- The Russian word for "to know" is знать (znat'). To say "you know" in Russian, that looks like this: знать → зна → знаешь
- The Russian word for "to talk" is говорить (govorit'). To say "they talk" in Russian, that looks like this: говорить → говори → говоришь
(Note: there are a few exceptions, and spelling rules sometimes cause minor changes, such as turning the "I" form -ю into -у)
Russian past tense
The Russian past tense is super easy—the only thing you have to worry about is the gender of the person doing the verb.
Simply remove the -ть from the end of the verb, then add one of the below endings accordingly:
Masculine | Feminine | Neuter | Plural |
---|---|---|---|
-л | -ла | -ло | -ли |
So, the Russian word for "to eat" is есть.
- "He ate" is он ел (on yel)
- "She ate" is она ела (ona yela)
- "We ate" is мы ели (my yeli)
Verbal aspect & Russian future tense
Whereas the past tense was a bit easier, the Russian future tense will present a challenge for learners: to use it correctly, you need to understand what's called verbal aspect. We'll talk about that more in the section on vocabulary, but to speak very roughly, you should know that most Russian verbs come in pairs: one is perfective, the other imperfective.
- Imperfective verbs are used when an action (a) is ongoing or (b) will repeat for an indefinite period of time
- Perfective verbs are used when an action (a) is completed or (b) will repeat for a known/limited amount of times
For imperfective verbs, conjugate the verb быть (to be) into the present tense, and attach the infinitive/normal form of your desired word:
Person → | Я, I (will) | Мы, we (will) | Ты, you (informal) (will) | Вы, you (formal) (will) | Он/она/оно (will) | Они, they (will) |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
быть | буду | будем | будешь | будете | будет | будут |
So, the imperfective form of "to watch" is смотреть (smotret'). To say "I will be watching...", that would be буду смотреть (budu smotret').
Now things get tricky.
Perfective verbs can't exist in the present tense: an action either is done (meaning past tense) or isn't done (meaning future tense). This means that when you conjugate a perfective form into the present tense, it actually has a future-tense meaning: something will be done.
The perfective form of the verb "to watch" is посмотреть (posmotret'). To say "I will watch...", you'd simply follow the present tense conjugations above to get посмотрю.
Russian participles
While beyond the scope of this blog article, know that participles are very important to Russian sentence structure.
In English, we have two participles:
- The present participle, which is the ~ing form of verbs
- The past participle, which is used with have/had (had gone)
And Russian takes this to a whole new level:
- Participles are often used as adjectives, and thus follow the grammatical case rules we discussed above
- Participles are also used as adverbs
It's a beautiful system when you get it down, but it'll take a lot of practice.
Here's the most practical explanation of Russian participles I've personally found, if you'd like to explore the topic further.
[Russian vocabulary] Word formation, verbs of motion, and verbal aspect
When you think of learning vocabulary, it probably doesn't seem all that complicated: you see a word, you learn the word, and then you're able to use the word. Learning vocabulary is hard because you need to learn a lot of words, but it's not complex or confusing.
And then we have languages like Russian.
Verbal aspect
Let's quickly contrast tense and aspect:
- Tense places an action on a timeline, telling you the point or period in time when something took place
- Aspect concerns how an action unfolds, telling you if it was completed, is in progress, happens regularly, and so forth
Tense and aspect come in pairs in English: the present progressive/continuous tense (as in "I'm eating") actually means present tense (happening now), progressive/continuous aspect (in progress).
In Russian, tense and aspect are entirely separate concepts:
- Some words are perfective in aspect, other words are imperfective in aspect
- All verbs can be situated in the past or future, and imperfective verbs can also be situated in the present
And this means that, whereas we often just see one word in English (to watch), Russian will see the necessity for two verbs: смотреть (smotret') to say that you watched something but didn't finish watching it, and посмотреть (posmotret') to say that you watched something and finished it. For example, you'd say смотреть if you watched 20 minutes of a movie, but посмотреть if you watched the entire movie.
Verbal aspect presents a grammatical problem in the short term, as you'll have to disentangle it from tense. From that point on, it's a neverending vocabulary problem: in addition to learning what a Russian word means, you'll also have to know if it's perfective or imperfective to use it correctly.
Vocabulary formation with prefixes
At first glance, Russian vocabulary seems like it shouldn't present many challenges. Looking at Russian and English's lexical similarity, we see a score of 24%. To put that in perspective, French and English have a similarity of 27%. So this shouldn't be that much harder than French, right?
Not quite.
Remember how, way up above, we said that Russian was a fusional language (it likes to smash a bunch of words into one long word) whereas English was an analytical language (it likes to have many separate/unique words)?
This extends to vocabulary, too.
Russian has a rich series of prefixes that attach to words and slightly change their meaning. For example, conider the below example, where English has four very different words but Russian has four flavors of one word:
- To go — ходить (khodit')
- To exit — выходить (vykhodit', "vy" meaning "outwards")
- To arrive — приходить (prikhodit', "pri" meaning "attachment")
- To approach — подходить (podkhodit', "pod" meaning "toward")
There are 23 such verbal prefixes, and as a beginner, it'll take some time to get used to the idea of seeing "to arrive" as just another form of "to go".
Verbs of motion
So, in the above section we said that ходить (khodit') meant "to go".
That's true... but there's more to the story than that.
Russian verbs that involve movement (usually) come in pairs:
- A unidirectional word, which means you have a concrete destination in mind and are going there
- A multidirectional word, which is used for habitual actions, movements made multiple times, or "wandering" movement without a set destination
ходить (khodit') is the multidirectional version of "to go"—you might think of it as something like "to wander". Its undirectional counterpart is идти (idti).
So, for example:
- You'd use идти (idti) to ask someone if they want to go to the movie theater tonight
- You'd use ходить (khodit') if you go to the movie theater every Friday night
But wait! There's more!
Both ходить and идти refer to movement by foot. If you're driving straight somewhere, you'd use the verb eхать (yekhat'); if you're talking about your regular commute you'd use the multidirectional verb eздить (yezdit')
Furthermore, these verbs are all imperfective. When you add a prefix to them, as with выходить (vykhodit') or подходить (podkhodit') from above, they become perfective.
Whereas we can get away with just saying "go" or "take" in English, regardless of context, Russian requires you to be much more specific. This will take getting used to.
[Russian pronunciation] Palatalization, lexical stress, and new sounds
Russian grammar is hard, Russian vocabulary is hard, and Russian pronunciation contains several challenges of its own, too.
While it would take several dozen pages to talk about all of the sounds in Russian, we can cover a lot of the key problems with just three issues:
- Palatalization (a way of modifying a consonant)
- Lexical stress (which syllable of a word gets the "oomph")
- A few sounds that don't exist in English
Palatalization
Palatalization is a way of modifying the way a consonant sounds, and it's a super important aspect of Russian pronunciation.
Skipping the technical linguistic details, do me a favor:
- Say the word cannon very slowly; pay attention to the tip of your tongue, the middle of your tongue, and how your tongue moves as you say the word
- Say the word canyon and do the same thing
And here's what you should notice:
- When you say the NN in cannon, either the tip of your tongue or the spot just behind the tip of your tongue presses into the area just above the back of your front row of teeth
- When you say the NY in canyon, the middle region of your tongue also lifts toward the roof of your mouth
In a nutshell, all palatalization means is that you modify a sound by raising the middle of your tongue toward the roof of your mouth. Having said that, there are different types of sounds, and this "lift the middle of your tongue" may come more naturally to you with some sounds than others. For example:
- M, P, and B are made with your lips
- T, D, S, and Z are made with your tongue in the front of your mouth
- K and G are made with your tongue in the back of your mouth
In Russian, Palatalization is indicated in a few ways:
- If the soft sign ь follows a consonant, that consonant becomes palatalized
- (Note: If the hard sign ъ follows a consonant, that consonant remains unpalatalized, regardless of what letters it appears next to)
- If a consonant is followed by a soft consonant (я, ё, ю, е, и), the consonant becomes palatalized
- Щ and ч are always palatalized, no matter what letters appear around them
So this effectively means that you need to learn two versions of most Russian consonants:
- A non-palatalized "hard" version
- A palatalized “soft” version
Compare:
- The hard N sound in нос (nos, "nose") and the soft one in нёс (nyos, "carries") .
- The hard L sound in лук (luk, "onion") and the soft one in люк (lyuk, "manhole") .
- The hard T sound in мат (mat, "vulgar language") and the soft one in мать (mat', "mother") .
These sound very similar to native English speakers, but they are very different sounds to Russian speakers... and they're everywhere.
Lexical stress
In a case of poetic justice, English speakers learning Russian get to enjoy a taste of the medicine that everybody learning English is forced to swallow.
Take a moment and say these three words:
- Pulverize
- Important
- Tambourines
Notice that they have a kind of rhythm:
- PULverize
- imPORtant
- tambouRINES
All lexical stress means is that one syllable in a word gets a bit more oomph than the other syllables.
To see what I mean, say the word banana. Notice how these the A sounds underlined here (banana) sounds different than the middle A sound (banana).
The reason those As don't all sound the same is lexical stress.
- The middle A (banana) is stressed, so it gets pronounced "fully"
- The first and last A (banana) aren't stressed, so they get "reduced" and sound more like "uhh"
And Russian does the same thing.
- Every Russian word has stress on a particular syllable
- The quality of non-stressed syllables get reduced
- There's no way to predict which syllable gets stressed, so you just have to remember it
So you can't just remember what a Russian word means—you also need to remember its rhythm.
New sounds
Russian presents six main new sounds:
- X — Like a our H, but much breathier: compare хаос (khaos, "chaos") with the word "house"
- Ш — Like our "sh", but whereas we lift the middle of our tongue in English, Russians lay the middle of their tongue flat and lift the tip of their tongue straight up; compare шаг (shag, "step") and "shag"
- Ж — Like the "zh" sound in "pleasure", but differs in the same way as the above sound—we lift the middle of our tongue, Russians lift only the tip of their tongue; compare жанр (zhanr, "genre") and "genre"
- Щ — A palatalized "sh" sound—pronounce it with the tip of your tongue at the back and bottom of your bottom row of teeth and the middle of your tongue raised toward the roof of your mouth; compare щит (ssheet, "sheet") and "sheet"
- The Russian R — Trilled (or at least flapped) in certain circumstances; compare радио (radio, "radio") and "radio"
- Ы — An "ee" sound made further back in your mouth, kind of resembling the sound you make when you get punched in the gut; compare ты (ty, "you") and "tea"
[Cultural differences] Resources, friendship, and communication style
While Russian is a challenging language, some of what makes it difficult has to do with the culture surrounding it, rather than the language itself.
Lack of modern resources
Duolingo has a Russian course for beginners.
If you stray beyond that, though, you'll find your options surprisingly limited: books of practice exercises written in typewriter fonts that look like they indeed may not have been updated since people used typewriters.
For example, here are the Russian resources I got the most use out of as a beginner, personally:
- Russian Made Easy podcast — It's very simple and nothing is special about it, but it's clear, has a gentle learning curve, and will bring you from zero to one
- The New Penguin Russian Course (from 1996) — It breaks down the Cyrillic alphabet in a very simple way and does a nice job of presenting the cases one at a time, which can be difficult to wrap your head around as a beginner
- Sistema Kalinka's Russian Cases workbook — Each chapter is dedicated to a different case; there are many questions for you to try, an answer key, and OK explanations
- SmarTool's Anki Russian vocab decks — While not wonderful for beginners, as even early sentences contain some quite diffcult words, each card's main word is linked to wiktionary, where you can check the different cases of a word and whether a verb is perfective or imperfective (if you haven't used Wiktionary before, it's an incredible reference)
- Russian Podcast — There are over 400 episodes, the host uses simple but not childish language, and she is good about using simple Russian to explain more difficult words more expressions
- Tandem — A language exchange app; in my experience, Russian people are quite soical and happy to chat with you in Russian
And that leaves me feeling conflicted.
On the one hand, I did appreciate these resources.
On the other hand, when I consider the incredible resources available for languages like Japanese or Spanish, I can't help but feel underwhelmed when my main recommended resources for early Russian learners are 30 year old textbooks and a podcast.
Friendship
I moved to Moscow after having dated a Russian girl for three years. Despite going into Russia with an ally, and having already adjusted to life in three countries, it was the first time I really experienced culture shock.
You see, I'm from America's rural midwest. My default facial expression is a smile, and I make smalltalk with anybody I'm standing next to for more than six seconds. In my hometown, we wave at cars when they go by, even if we don't know who is driving.
Russia is very much not like that. What you'll immediately observe after stepping off the airplane is that Russians don't smile—in fact, everybody probably looks like they're about to go do something they don't really want to do. Despite the stereotype, this doesn't mean that Russians are cold—it's just that smiles are reserved for moments of actual joy. It takes a bit of work to turn a Russian acquaintance into a friend, but once you do, you'll find that they are much warmer than they first appeared.
This leads to a somewhat weird dynamic that's uncomfortable for both parties:
- Foreigners feel that Russians are distant and disinterested
- Russians feel that foreigners (and particularly Americans) are insincere and suspiciously friendly
There's not anything wrong with this, but it can make it a bit difficult to find your footing when you begin trying to communicate with Russian people.
Communication style
While you can't reduce an entire culture down to a single adjective, I think there's a fundamental difference in US and Russian approaches to communication:
- In the US—or at least the Midwest, where I'm from—we value politeness and friendliness
- In Russian—or at least Moscow—people value directness and honesty
And this leads to rubbing elbows in all sorts of places, without either party necessarily realizing what's going on.
My first encounter with this dynamic came on my first day in Russia, back in 2017, when I met my ex's mother: I asked how she was. She informed me that her feet had been bothering her and that, while she had moved to Moscow to be closer to her daughter, she disliked her job here and generally missed life in Ulyanovsk. I wasn't sure how to respond to this: to me, "how are you" is quite synonymous with "hello"—it's just how you greet somebody.
In Russia, if you ask how someone is, they will tell you. If you see them again on the same day, and ask them again, they may be offended: they already told you how they were, and you cared so little that you're asking again just a few hours later.
Suffice it to say that, even after you've made it over the "friend" hurdle, there will still be learning and growth that needs to happen on behalf of both you and your Russian friend or conversation partner.
Some silver linings for English speakers who want to learn Russian
As difficult as Russian is, the journey isn't entirely uphill. If you pursue through these initial challenges, you'll be rewarded.
A lot of Russian content is available for free
While there isn't much for beginners of Russian, if you can make it to the intermediate level, you've basically got it made. Russian is the fourth most common language on the internet, meaning that there is literally tons of content waiting for you.
And a lot of it is free, too.
For example, MosFilm (the leading Russian film industry) has uploaded literally hundreds of classic Soviet movies to YouTube. Here's one you can probably understand even if you don't speak any Russian:
Similarly, all six seasons of Kuxnya, one of the most famous Russian TV series, is also (officially) available for free on YouTube. (Yes, this is a 48-hour long YouTube video.)
Of course, many books are available to read online for free, too.
This is great news: the best way to learn Russian is to consume content that you enjoy, and the Russian-speaking world has made this very easy to do, no matter where you're at in the world.
Russians appreciate people who learn Russian
If you spend some time browsing r/LanguageLearning on Reddit, you'll see a story come up pretty consistently: people study a language for awhile, finally travel to a country where it's spoken, and then find that everybody just speaks English with them.
For better or worse, this is not an experience you'll have with Russian.
Whether abroad or in Russia, Russians I've met seem genuinely surprised that I'm interested in their language, and back that up by making a point to speak it with me. Many of my friends back in Moscow spoke English better than I spoke Russian, but I never spoke English unless I was at work.
Finding opportunities to exposure yourself to the language is important, no matter what language you want to learn, and this is something that wll be very easy for learners of Russian.
What makes Russian hard to learn, in a nutshell:
Russian just operates on a different system of logic than English does.
Each aspect of the language presents challenges. Learning Russian grammar will require you to learn about new linguistic concepts, and learning Russian vocabulary will require you to think about words in ways you aren't used to. Nevermind overcoming those problems—simply finding good resources to learn Russian can be difficult.
Nevertheless, if you're interested in learning Russian but are put off by its difficulty—don't be. Russian is really hard... but each language presents its own challenges. The only real difference is that Russian is very transparent about its complexities.
So, go for it! And заходи, если че (zakhodi, yesli cho; "call if you need anything.")
(If you decide to try finding Russian conversation partners on Tandem, use that as your tagline. You'll be pleased with the results.)